special sem

Should i take special sem? pay 600 for that?
My mum is dead against me taking. says it's a waste of $$.
My dad doesnt want me to waste away my hols, so i think he's for it, though 600 is making him think twice.
Me? i dunno. I feel useless in a way that everyone is either working or interning. and i'm slacking away. I feel like i should do something, so i'm thinking of taking special sem. But 600 bucks. Worth it? and it's my last hols. Should i slack it away? I dunno.
Oh well, application closes today. I should just apply, since i can still drop the module b4 it officially starts. hmm....
~MeHhz~

yayayay~!!!

Okay, my results are not great to many, but to me, i'm VERY satisfied.
I got no Cs!!! I didn't fail my PC1144 (i actually got a B- for it)!! I can hardly believe it sia.... Probably cos I'm guai enough to put in effort for lab reports and the 5 assignments. =)
and i finally got my FIRST A in NUS. Althought it's cos i cheated. :X I learn LAJ b4. so i got an A. But still.... for a stupid girl like me, you gotta cut me some slack and let me be happy with my first A right? :X
Holidays won't be so bad after all... my parents won't slaughter me. =)
~MeHhz~

LION KING

OMG!!!! LION KING MUSICAL WAS FANTASTIC!!!!
Haha.. booked tix about 2 months ago, wayyy before exams started. And i finally got to go watch it. AMAZING~ *hearts*
Voice was great, dance choreo (though not much dance) was super. I love the animals, esp the antelopes. dancers were super duper graceful when they jump. and the hyenas were damn funny. The storyline closely follows the cartoon, with many identical scenes. But to see these scenes with all the super nice costumes, props, etc... LIVE! it's just WOW. Several super touching scenes as well! how they moved from scene to scene was smooth and the flow of the whole story was just damn nice.
I learnt to appreciate songs, background music and dances quite early. But it was through RH concert that i learnt to appreciate the props, the sets, the stage management, etc. LION KING was great it all. Those in Singapore, GO WATCH!! Ex, but to me, WORTH IT. There's quite alot of humour in it too!!!
Thanks YW for accompanying me!!! and for the first time, i WENT TO MARINA BAY SANDS~! haha... walked through the helix bridge finally, and get to see it at night as well! whee~ the whole area was just super nice.... couples should go there pak toh~ haha... very romantic spot. XD
Tmr gonna watch POTC4. yay! =)
~MeHhz~

2 weeks...

haix... 2 weeks of slacking, and i haven't started a single drama. Okay, maybe one episode of hidarime tantei. But haven't found it interesting enough to continue. Finished my library books and haven't went to the library. I'm left with a book i borrowed on impulse regarding antimatter. Have yet to start. Haven't had draving refreshers for quite awhile since my dad start 9-5 job recently = no car to practice even if i want to.
Now, i'm marking stuff for my bro. Damn sian. not that i don't wanna help, but it gets irritating to know that i'm marking stuff and he's away surfing the net. bleh. so i'm taking my own sweeet time to mark as well. and i returned the 2/3 of that stack back to him to mark. Marking can really be damn sian. I mean if u left me the stack to mark in the afternoon, i doubt i'll have much complains. But u pass me that super thick stack to mark finish by tonight, sian lah~ keep telling me its very easy, just tick tick tick. But it's damn sian esp when u see the shit work they give. so.... bleh! i shall be unhelpful tonight! hehe~
i should (really) start doing productive things next week. urgh. results day on monday. Probably after getting shit results i'll be throwing myself into another book to cheer myself. Then, maybe i might have more motivation to start doing productive stuff. :X
~MeHhz~
P.S. Heh. this post is NOT emo! XD

whahaha.

So i became a lousy daughter again.
Thanks ma.
~MeHhz~

The Blue Sword

Stumbled across this jewel in the library while i was hunting for old books i read during secondary school. Written by Robin McKinley, i read it b4, but rmbed that i didn't really go for it. Still i completed the book cos that's what i always do, once i start a storybook, i read it till the end, WITHOUT skipping pages at all, so i can built up suspense. I rmb i thought it was kinda dry or a trifle toooo descriptive. But feeling nostalgic, i decided to borrow it again and reread it. and Wha~ i was addicted to it. Maybe i was too young then to appreciate the detailed description that painted the lifestyle of the hillfolk, or the minute details of characters - how they smiled wryly, controlled amusement in their faces, the subtle actions that actually explained the movement of the plot, etc...
Glad to have reread the book. =) maybe i should try other titles by this author, though i rmb not liking the other titles at all.... Maybe my opinions will change, IF i can find other titles.
Its quite disappointing to realise that some good books i used to read and reread are now gone from the library. Prolly too old. Like The Seer and the Sword, by Victoria Hanley. I think i've read that book about 6 times? and after 5 years? i don't really rmb the plot anymore!! i wanna read it again. But searching tha national library data base, there's only 1 library branch in Singapore that has that book. And it's wayyyy too far to go and borrow (and i'm not wasting $1.55 to reserve and have it brought over to tampines libary). Same goes for some other books. Even the whole collection of REPLICA, by Marilyn Kaye(i still rmb!) - a series that i've been addicted to when i was in pri school - is gone from the library. =( Replica was about a genetically engineered teenage girl that has the best genes in EVERYTHING, running, studies, sports, music, eyesight, gymnastics, everything. Almost superhuman. And there's the organisation that tries to kill her. super interesting. =) but such good books are gone. Probably taken over by other newer books..... sigh.
Oh well, time to source for new stories to read~ =)

Went out with eveline, brandon and james today for GANTZ. Rather interesting show! and had quite a fun time chatting with all of them after not meeting them since exam has ended. Lets go watch BECK!!
~MeHhz~

=)

Yay~ uber slack today. :X *i should feel guilty* haha.
Watched tonari no totoro, the notebook, and first epi of hidari me no tantei.
Watched p.s i love you yesterday too...
Awww. such sweet movies. The notebook was totally touching, it's like the perfect love story, growing old and dying tgt. P.S i love you was rather heart wrenching... but still, really sweet.
Ha. i rmbed i do cry when i watch touching scences, be it sappy love stories or touching display of humanity. So i guess it's not like i don't cry infront of others though i try not to. :P
Tmr~ lunch out with my parents. hopefully they'll buy groceries and stuff and keep dragging till i don't have to have that 'refresher course' cos there's not enough time. I hope!
Yw! hurry finish ur exams, then i pass u some movies! there's a few which we always wanted to watch but no chance!! =)
~MeHhz~

because

because i hate to end with an emo post, i'm blogging again~ Haha...
finally finished the 2 new books by Tamora Pierce, titled Terrier and Bloodhound. I sooo wanna get my hands on the third book in the series Mastiff, but libraries don't seem to have it in the records. Gotta check again. Else, hopefully some rental book stores have it, though i doubt so cos this author ain't exactly famous. :X
And i know i've read toooo much if my eyes are itching like crazy now. and i think of guys as coves, women as mots, girls as gixies and look around wondering if cats could really talk. Haha... It's nice to dwell in another era once in awhile. XD
Done with the addictive books.... what should i do tmr? having a break from driving refreshers cos my dad has something on tmr... HENG AH~ Haha..... perhaps i should touch the piano and swipe off the think layer of dust that has gathered.
Or start on a drama/anime.... *rubs chin*
~MeHhz~
Edit: argh.. i just found out the third book, Mastiff won't be out till oct 25 2011. =(

i applaud you.

you ARE the only one in my life that can make me shed tears like mad. Seriously. I've NEVER been afraid to go for a lesson so much that i wanna cry. And i've been to many lessons since young. Piano, speech and drama, chinese grp tuition, creative writing, ballad, english grp tuition, aikido, guitar, etc etc... I attend such courses with JOY or dread, but never fear.
NOW, after close to 2 years of getting my driving license, and not touching the car, you wanna give me a 'refresher course' during my hols. For your effort, i thank you.
B4 the 3rd session today, my mum asked me if i'm nervous. Nervous? for driving a car? No. I'm scared, of you. Not the car.
But after the third 'session' today. I APPLAUD YOU. For being able to make me shed tears then and there in the car for ALL three lessons. To tell the truth, I CAN CONTROL MY TEARS WELL. i NEVER cried infront of others. even seldom infront of my family. when i get bad results, i can control. even when others who fare better then me shed their tears. When i'm sad, i can control infront of others. When popo passed away, i didn't cry too. When i heard news of yuling passing away, i didn't either. when you scolded me at home, i didn't too. Only when i'm alone in the toilet or at night on my bed, will i allow myself to cry.
BUT, to be trapped in the car with you barking at my side. for all 3 sessions, i couldn't control. You're seriously damn capable. Oh well... after typing so much, i've more or less cooled down. All i can do is steel myself to walk to the car as usual tmr, and try again. The day i don't cry is probably the day i either don't have 'refresher course' from you, or the day when u finally get a sore throat from shouting/scolding so much.
Cheers! ~MeHhz~
I hate myself for thinking this. But i wish you would go to work (overseas) soon. I know you worked hard for us, and to wish that u're away from home is plain mean. But right now, i really do wish you're working and not at home. I'm sorry.

ignore

yup, whoever's reading my blog, just ignore me for the moment. being rather emo nemo for the previous posts. But really, i'll be fine after a few hours or so. after escaping into storybooks or dramas. =)

ureshikunai.

It gets harder and harder to pick myself up once i get scolded and told i'm useless and stupid. Strange. I've heard these comments since young. His way of teaching never changes. I thought i'll just get more used to it as i grow older. However, the words that never really affected me seems to really make sense now, making it harder to accept and carry on. The young me was at least exceling in certain areas. I was damn fat, but at least i did well in studies. I sucked at piano practical, but theory was okay. There was always some part of me that i could console myself with.
These days, facing the same kind of lectures and scoldings, it's harder to brush them aside knowing how true the words are. I've heard working life is cruel, with backstabbers and bosses telling you straight in your faces how lousy you are. I've never worked so far, but i hope it won't be worse than what i'm getting now. Else i doubt i can even survive.
It's getting harder to tell myself: okay sheri, the lecture is over. Deal with it, face your faults, change whatever needs to be changed. smile.
But still i have to do so. It's not like me to be a crybaby. As i grow older, everything i do seems wrong. Everything about me seems faulty. I guess it has to do with facing expectations, the pressure and such. i've gotta be stronger.
Come on sheri. Stop being such a weakling.
~MeHhz~

when will you stop?

Pardon my language in this post if i end up accidentally typing swear words and forgetting to edit them out. I'm just freakin pissed.
I'm just sitting down there reading my storybook, and u had to come by and ask: what did u do the whole afternoon? Sit down and read ur stupid book ah? Don't waste ur time on stupid books.
I mean. COME ON! I reading a bloody book, on medieval magic and fantasy. I'm not going out everyday to party. I'm not watching dramas. I'm not facing the computer and ignoring my family. WTF do you want from me?! Must i really be studying or doing something productive!? yah. i admit, i'm too lazy to go an exercise. I'm fat. sorry lah, for not letting u have a slim beautiful daughter. But i'm READING!!!! not fucking wasting my time. and u call it useless shit. FINE. then what about you? sitting at home, tending to ur bonsais and flowers from morning till night. I can also call them a bloody waste of time. Cos flowers will die no matter how much u tend to it. and wasting hundreds of dollars on plants is stupid. But i NEVER said anything. Okay, granted, not my money. U earned it, U slogged for us, your right to spend it. BUT i NEVER said anything cos i RESPECT the hobbies of others. For every simple thing in the world, it's NEVER useless, never a waste of time as long as it's an enjoyment.

Then comes mum forbidding me to go out. Okay, maybe she didn't exactly FORBID me, but i backed down b4 i get more shit from my dad. I'm just going out to sing K with 3 guy friends cos unfortunately my female friends are interning. U're not happy. HELLO?! i'm TWENTYTWO this year and u still worry about me going out with guy FRIENDS!? okay, i hurriedly lied that one of the guy's GF is coming along too, so i'm not the only girl. Guess what my mum's reaction is?
"Then if the couple don't go tmr how?? you along with 2 guys in the KTV room.... Your father is not gonna be happy. He won't allow."
WTH!? Who do you think my friends are? Who do u think i am!? WTF is going to happen if i'm singing K with 2 other guys? When i was younger, i NEVER had any close guys friends cos i'm just used to girl friends and guys seem to just group together or choose the popular girls to mix with. But now, WTH is wrong with having close guy friends!? I'm not some little girl anymore. Firstly, WTH can happen when i sing k with guys? my friends are not some assholes that can't be trusted. Secondly, they are already attached. thirdly, i'm not some great tempting beauty. fourthly, HELLO, i'm YOUR daughter, can't u at least have faith in me and my choice of friendS?! fifth, MY WHOLE LIFE, i'm surrounded by my bro, and 4 other GUY COUSINS my age in malaysia. I'm not exactly close to my girl cousins and those in singapore are all way younger than me. I'm USED to mixing with boys. Hell, i'm almost a guy myself i think. With weird guyish preferences for clothes and hobbies.
At worst, these guy friends are just like 'jie mei' with me. and i'm deprived of a chance to go sing K. It's been sooooo long since i last went for K. I've been guai guai at home for the whole bloody week. Haven't been meeting any friends. What's your problem man. I'm already twenty two. Let me get a life can?!
~MeHhz~
Shit, i can't even hole up in a corner and enjoy good storybooks for a week. can't u stop being a control freak?

hols....

slacking my ass off during this holiday. but surprisingly, i'm not watching dramas or anime, not reading fanfics, not catching up on more manga. Somehow i'm back to books. Storybooks that draw me into their fantasy world. Rereading Secondary school favourites like those by Tamora Pierce. On and off watching movies thanks to kevin for dl-ing and jy for copying. once in awhile i'll drag my bro to watch with me. XD on the big screen TV in the living room, plugged in thru thumbdrive, with awesome soundsystem. SHIOK. It's times like these that i'm really thankful to my dad for indulging in such tech-y stuff even though we get tired of hearing him brag about how he work and slog for the family to provide us with such previleges (when we nvr asked for it, and he's the one who actually fully enjoys them. Us? we're usually too busy to use them). But oh well, i know my dad really worked hard supporting this family and he has all the right to brag about it (although we get sian of it sometimes. haha.). But still our dad loves us and we him.

So... after indulging in storybooks with my nose stuck to pages until i fully complete the books, fanfics which i was sooo addicted to now seems so superficial in their plots and my eyes hurt after staring at the screen for an hour. Old, pagey storybooks are still the best!

K, slacked quite alot but at least i packed my messy room once again and notes are properly file and shelved. Spaces found for textbooks, and my table's no longer cluttered. Been staying home ever since the outing with indy. Guess i'm saving $$ for any future outings plus my dad and bro's bday in June. haha.

hmm... Been having some reminders these days, reading thru blogs, listening to my dad's nagging, etc... sometimes, i just forget to give thanks to god for all that i have and be satisfied. Sometimes i tend to view others in a biased perspective. It's time to stop, think and reflect during these hols... =)

~MeHhz~

tsukaremashita

Marked pri 4 school work for my bro till about 6am this morning. Zzzz.. all because today's the last day of school before midyear exams.... tsk tsk. Well, at least i get a free movie from him~ XD
Anyway, sleep for 5hrs then went to meet indy for iceskating & movie. and they were late as usual. =.='' somehow, i'm not surprised. haha.. so used to it already. ICESKATING! was fun. long time no iceskate le. the last time was probably at fuji ice palace @ jurong b4 it closed down. approx 3years? got a blister on my foot in the end =.='' cos i have broad feet. oh well... at least i had fun skating. =)
LOVE ice skating cos it gives me some sense of freedom, feeling the cold air across my face as i skate around in circles, in control of my own speed and destination [ya, i know. it's just a small circular ring]. Since young, i've been roller blading, having fun chasing my bro around, blading on the highest storey of multistorey carparks (the open air part), going up and down slopes. But as i grew older, i started to hate blading. Cos it was just a period where i get scolded by my dad, for waddling like a duck, for not being able to stop without using the rubber piece at the back of the blades, for not learning more methods to turn, for not being able to do some basic tricks. But i mean, i never was a sporty person! obviously my bro is damn pro, but i'm not my bro.
But now, i'm rather thankful to those scoldings. At least i can skate fairly well now, with better balance. At least i won't look like a short fat pig rolling around. haha. Blading became fun again when i'm with friends, like TPSC pengyous, skating at ECP, or AQUOS iceskating, holding on to each other and pulling each other along (damn long nvr skate tgt le! )... and now with indy too!
Anyway, after skating was movie, FAST AND FURIOUS 5! Worth watching! action scenes shiok as usual, with damn funny parts in between. Thoroughly entertained! Was so afraid i'll fall asleep cos of how tired i was, but i totally didn't feel sleepy throughout the movie. haha.
Then dinner was at old airport road. First time there! =) food was fantastic. esp the hou jian, and the chee cheung fun. I'm a sucker for chee cheng fun, esp that kind of handmade ones with the canto style sauce instead of the sweet ones. and it's 2bucks only!! And i saw uncle hubert's turtle soup store also. haha...
Overall, Damn tiring friday, but fun. =)

Many are gonna start work coming monday. It's still my hols, cos i'm not working. But i should start doing some things. I haven't even watched any dramas after my exams! time to start watching drama, anime, movies, read storybooks, etc.... (when my dad is overseas working). for now, i should find some more productive things to do. ha.
~MeHhz~

Exams are over~

Last paper, Engineering prof was kinda.... smoky? haha... i'm just trying to smoke my way through it all..... *rubs chin* hmm... hopefully i can at least get a B? :X
Anyway, after the paper, was lunch/dinner with eveline, brandon and uday. Followed by the movie THOR. Awesome movie. Plot was soso, but overall, was entertaining, with nice effects, etc.... =)
Wed was spent waking up late, out for 2pm lunch with parents, lingered till about 5pm. Then back home to help my bro mark school work. =.='' 6 consecutive hours of marking english. slacked at 11pm, surf net, go sleep. haha...
Thurs, was spent slacking, listening to songs, getting some mother's day stuff, then reading manga. OMG~ long time no read. Just caught up with recent chapters of Skip Beat. Awww~ and the chapter ended at 175. Cliffhanger somemore! =( anyway, time to help my bro mark maths now.. haha...
Tmr, friday. ICESKATING~!! after soooo long. [ And for once, not with AQUOS. no more holding on and pulling pris along, skating tgt with jacq~ =( ] haha... but now it's INDY. i wonder who knows how to skate and who doesn't. and if i still rmb how to skate. after that, it's FAST AND FURIOUS 5!! whee~ then gotta go home liao.... =( oh well.. better find out how to go leisure park first. haha.
~MeHhz~

LAST PAPER IN 22+hrs!

Ahhh.... i'm slacking like nobody's business.
have yet to memo the last part of the module, on copyright, patents and trademark laws... sigh.... so waste time lor.. why need to memo when these info should be able to be found on the net. =.='' Oh well.... time to chiong thru it soon~
I realised i can actually be really selfish if someone pisses me off. haha.. it's just too bad~
Tmr (or rather later today) is finally 'end of exams' day. time to breathe freely till results are out on 30th may. then i'll decide if i should take special sem. so excited!!! can't wait to be exam-free!! no more pressure weighing down on me till the next sem starts... =)
~MeHhz~

Secret Garden

Haha... finally finished secret garden. :X Screwed up my body clock, but oh well, i'll still wake up by lunch later today and then start mugging! *fighting!*
Hmm... Overall, quite a nice drama... Started out kinda slow/boring.. :X but by epi 5, it was damn funny already.. haha... Couldn't stop laughing at all the stupid/funny moments... Then near the end, it became the 'sob-sob' story... T.T but still, nice ending, very sweet, and funny. haha... I'm probably not really crazy over it cos of the boring beginning... but the funny parts are entertaining enough XD
Oh! there's one character 'oska' whom i think the actor really looks like the japanese actor 'kimutaku' when he smiles. But still, kimutaku more shuai. Oska looks old when he doesn't smile. haha... Watched the 'special' episode too. the NGs are DAMN funny!!! XD esp when u realise all the 'awwww so sweet' moments have the funny NGs behind. HAHA...
Oh well, end of drama marathon. Tmr, back to reality. MUG. Wash toilet. *yawn* Kk... better go sleep if not i can't wake up tmr~ :X
~MeHhz~

2days of freedom~

Yosh!!! my parents are going to malacca over the weekends~!!!! i'm home ALONE!! yay!! it's like being back in hall again, no more parents breathing down my neck! haha... though my bro's still at home, but he doesn't really care what i do~
i shall take this chance and celebrate the END OF SEM 6 EXAMS!!! (though i still have a last paper on tues) oops... haha... Shall marathon the korean drama 'secret garden' the whole of sat and try to finish it. Then sunday meet yw to mug and do household stuff like wash clothes, water plants, wash toilet etc.. and when my parents are back on monday 2am, tada~ i'm mugging again~ haha...
I know i shouldn't be slacking now, but since parents (dad in particular) NEVER lets me watch dramas in peace (he's damn against 'wasting time' watching dramas), i shall just give my 'potato couch personality' a treat and throw myself into the drama plot now that they are not around. Muahahaha~
It's just for 1 day though. I'll be mugging on sunday and monday for tues paper. After exams, it's time to find a job, or find some productive stuff to do, like complete the score for 'teenage dream', or pick up autocad, or go read digital fundamentals, or go practice piano and once and for all master those disgusting chords. And go borrow 'Arthur' from CLB and finish reading the Pendragon Cycle.
Time to meet up with long-time-no-see friends too!!!
~MeHhz~

yatta~

Done with the 2nd paper. 2 more to go. and i'm in slacking mood.
Hmm.. sort of switched to radio these few days... 96.3fm, 92.4fm and 93.3fm.
Dunno why, my taste for music has changed rather drastically. From mando pop in secondary school, to english pop for a short period of time. But these don't really catch my attention these days, unless they have uber nice chord progressions or melody. I went crazy for anime songs for a period, but ended up with Jrock in the end, cos some anime songs were just real irritating. Jrock bands have specific styles that suit my taste.. but these days... sort of no mood to search up on new songs. I end up with lyric-less songs recently (that's why 96.3 and 92.4fm) but that's probably cos i won't sing along with them while i mug. Hmm... i should catch up on jrock or jazzy piano songs once exams are over....
~MeHhz~
Yes! i can have paragraphing in my posts already! switched to firefox to blog. tsk! stupid IE.

Whee~

Been blogging alot recently cos of exams. I'll probably blog ALOT LESS once exams are over. XD no stress, spend time playing = less blog posts. Whee~ Finally finished with cheat sheet. Seriously speaking, i still don't understand the back 25% of the module. But i don't care anymore, time to sleep b4 i stone during the 9am exam later. Haha.... After this paper, i'm left with japanese language (whew, no pressure :X ) and engineering professionalism. Okay, for eng prof i'll probably die cos i'm bad at 'essay-type' exams, but still at least it's memory work and i have 4 days b4 the exam to start (yup, haven't touched that mod). After exams, lotsa stuff i wanna do, but i need $$. haha.. Thank god for the 600 bucks from the govt. i can watch movies, play paintball, go universal studios, go iceskating, shopping, etc... Hopefully i don't exactly waste my 3 months. hokay~ off to sleep. ~MeHhz~